Out of the Dark

     It’s hard to believe that we are within a few weeks of moving into the foreign mission field. It has been a little over two years since we began feeling this draw on our hearts that we couldn’t explain, and a year and a half since God made his plan for our family evident. Back during the time we were led to the ministry of Centro Prenatal, all we wanted to do was get down to Costa Rica and get involved. Being around the people that serve in this ministry and hearing the stories of the clients and how this ministry has been bringing hope to the lost and hurting was so moving. We were instantly hooked and felt God had given us this great opportunity to step out in our faith while experiencing the deep and lasting joy that only comes from loving and serving others.

     Over the past year and a half, the process of getting to Costa Rica has been filled with many ups and downs. We have been humbled and we have been encouraged. We have had times of great trust in the power and provision of God, and we have had times where we felt alone, scared and confused. The past few months especially have been filled with a heavy spiritual warfare on the battlegrounds of...

  • our marriage

  • our family

  • our personal relationships with the Father.

     During the past couple of months, all the stress of moving away had begun to blind me of what we are moving towards. The enemy has been working hard on getting our eyes off of the joyously challenging road ahead that God has invited us into and put them on the loss of comforts and relationships we are about to experience. All the fears and anxiety of raising support, leading a family into a foreign country, and the loss of so many good gifts had taken the eyes of my heart off of the ultimate joy that comes from seeking and savoring Christ above all else.

     Going into this final trip to Costa Rica before we move, my prayer was one of desperation. I really needed God to renew my heart and mind. To restore my war-torn soul and remind me of not only the call into ministry that he had given us but the joy that comes from loving others more than ourselves. On Wednesday this week we got the chance to serve at the Jaco center and witness the impact the ministry is having in the lives of some of the clients. It was so powerful to be a part of praying over the women that were there that day.

In that moment, God simply reminded me that it’s not about what you are leaving, it’s about what you are invited into.

You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
— Psalms 16:11

     Through this process, the Lord has been dragging my heart away from the good things he has blessed me with, not for my pain but for my ultimate pleasure. Understanding that however, in the middle of the storm seems nearly impossible. When life around you feels like it is slipping away and your falling out of a perceived control, it's hard to trust that these things are working for your good. Thankfully our God is gracious and patient. While I can move quickly into a chicken little posture, thinking that the sky is falling, God lovingly reminds me of his presence through it all. His promises are not only to sustain me during the times of war and storms but bring me to a fullness of joy that I would not be able to experience without walking down those tough paths.

     This past trip served as a reminder of the joy God has invited our family into. Sure there will be challenges and pain ahead but they only serve to push us deeper in our reliance on Christ and in his presence we can truly experience a fullness that will outweigh every loss.